Moray Women's Aid's guidance helped domestic abuse victim through 'hardest time of her life'

A DOMESTIC abuse survivor has praised the "reassurance and support" she received from Moray Women's Aid during her darkest days.

Mary (not her real name) fled to live at Marleon House, in Elgin, after being subjected to nearly a decade of a physical and mental abuse by her former partner.

Leaving the house that her school-aged children knew as home was not an easy step – but staff at Moray Women's Aid provided a safe and welcoming place for Mary and the children.

"The workers provided support, guidance and security that helped me and the children through one of the hardest times of our lives," she said.

"Moray Women's Aid provides a friendly, warm and safe environment for people to recover with the reassurance there is security and support there.

"That support is there no matter the time of the day, you can always reach out. Having someone there, in a secure building, gives people the chance to recover.

"Fleeing domestic abuse takes courage, but those that do, men or women, need to know that support is out there.

"There are people out there who understand and can be a huge support in a very difficult time in life."

Abuse can take many forms – but one that Mary was quick to point out was coercive, controlling abuse – something she believes is less well understood.

This occurs when abusers take control over many small, every-day aspects of a victim's life – such as what time they go to bed, when they can go out with their friends or go to work. It also includes emotional and verbal abuse.

"It is something that many people do not realise they are being subjected to," Mary added. "I never realised until I left and Women's Aid explained.

"Some people might not put it down as abuse. Some abusers are physical, some are controlling, but it is still abuse regardless of the form.

"Women's Aid talk things through with you, explain things that you might not understand and can help with counselling and support work."

After a number of months living in Women's Aid, Mary and her children – who she said were her focus and strength – moved into a house. The family's new home was in a different town as it wasn't safe for them to return.

Support for all those who move on from living in Marleon House remains at the end of a phone or text. All support is private and confidential.

Mary added that Women's Aid were great with her children, with lots of activities and games for the young ones to enjoy.

Adults are also allowed time to relax, with pizza and film nights, as well arts and crafts. There is a chance to meet other like-minded individuals. Mary added that she met one of her best friends during her recovery.

Women experiencing abuse can contact Moray Women's Aid on 01343 548549 or Police Scotland's domestic abuse investigation officers on 01224 307104.

Men suffering abuse can contact Mankind on 01823334244 or Abused Men in Scotland on 08088 000024.